Astros Crawfish Potluck: August 3rd, 2019

It’s the Saturday Crawfish Potluck Boil!

I know what you’re thinking and I know why you’re here. You love the Astros, you want directions to the latest and best Astros and baseball content on the internet, and you know you can always count on the TCB staff to give it to you.

Well, as a result of the trade deadline, TCB staff is shorthanded, so it’s up to you, the TCB community, to find some Astros and baseball links and report back here with them.

Where did the TCB Staff go?

Only new guys Eric, Cody, Josh and Stephen showed up today.

With Max Stassi traded, Hatter was left with no real purpose. Arrangements were made to trade him to Twinkietown, after he was caught writing an article for their front page.

HebrewHammah wrote roughly 70 trade target profiles leading up to the deadline. The Astros traded for none of them. His expertise now in question, Hammah has been designated for assignment.

After the Greinke trade, the Astros farm system is now empty. With no prospects, Spencer Morris and Jimmy Price have nothing to do and have been given their unconditional release to go to Gaslamp Ball and DRaysBay.

Theo confronted Scottydouble over the fact that Theo only seems to recap losses while every Scotty recap seems to be an Astros win. Scotty was seen pointing at Theo, saying something about “Wins Above Replacement Writers” shortly before Theo took a swing at him. Both are currently indisposed.

CKuno never actually went on vacation. The truth is he never loved TCB and left us. No, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back together, but the courts say he’s still supposed to write us one series preview, due the first of every month, and comment for one afternoon every other weekend.

Exile in Saint Louis appears to have been banished somewhere, but we have few clues as to where. We found a ticket stub that says “Missouri”, so we’ve alerted the authorities in Kansas City.

Jason Marbach never really existed. He was just in your imagination. It’s time you all knew.

Bilbos tried to negotiate for a raise from VOX media, but was told that if they pay him any more than the 13 cents an hour he is currently getting, they would go over the luxury tax threshold, thanks to the albatross of a contract still in the books for CRPerry13.

The trade deadline was good to the Astros. It has not been good to TCB.

Times are hard here.

Please. Find a link, bring it here and paste it in the comments. Your contribution of just one link per Saturday Potluck can save an underappreciated unpaid writer.

Temp writers are standing by to place them in the Potluck Boil.

Pitcher Vince Velasquez has a defensive night to remember. IN THE OUTFIELD (mhatter106, SBNation)

Johnny Damon warns the Yankees and Astros that the Red Sox will be scary in the playoffs (Robncypress57, TMZ)

Fangraphs’ Eric Longenhagen chatted about Whitley, Toro and the brilliance of the Astros’ front office (Exile in Saint Louis, Fangraphs)

[ YOUR STORY LINK COULD BE HERE ]