One month into the season, relive the highs and lows of the start of the Astros’ 2019 season, one haiku at a time, courtesy of AdmonkeyTX. You can also use this page as a directory to find your favorite games’ recaps, gamethreads, series previews and Crawfish Boxes articles.
Astros at Rays (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #001, Opening Day
This Opening Day
Rays are Schnelled, showing the world
Verlander was robbed.
HOU-Ku Haiku #002, Salted Nuts
A hard one to lose
Against a former teammate,
Morton salting nuts.
HOU-Ku Haiku #003, Position Changes
Bregs had a Birthday.
Hundred Million Dollar Man
Buys his own shortcake.
HOU-Ku Haiku #004, Get Out
Tampa calls it their
hometown Tropicana Field.
- Introducing the 2019 Astros - Getting to know our new players - by HebrewHammah
- Is It Fair to Label Carlos Correa as Injury-Prone? - by mhatter106
- Aledmys Diaz: Is He Really This Bad? - by bilbos
- McHugh comes out swinging. . . or getting swings! - by HebrewHammah
- Which Astros Pitching Prospects Could Help in 2019? - by AstrosFuture
- Prospects who will impact the 2019 Astros: Position Players - by Exile in St. Louis
Astros at Rangers (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #005, Who Could Blame Them?
Ballpark’s last season.
Next year’s Rangers play inside
Minute Maid Park North.
HOU-Ku Haiku #006, Frustrated Haiku
Runs, runs, runs, runs, runs.
The Astros really need runs.
Runs, runs, runs, runs, runs.
HOU-Ku Haiku #007, Ready for Robo-Umps
Has competition this year.
Sucks? Mea Kulpa.
- Astros Minor League Players to Watch in 2019 - by AstrosFuture
- The Bizarro World First Week in the American League - by bilbos
- Reviewing the Astros through the Fangraphs Power Ratings - by HebrewHammah
- Proof that Ron Kulpa was Biased Against the Astros - by bilbos
- Astros Week One Review: Every Little Thing’s Gonna Be Alright - by bilbos
- Bad Luck is Dragging Down the Astros Offense - by Theo Gerome
Athletics at Astros (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #008, Home Opener
Open the roof, yo.
Dispel those evil spirits;
Got that win tonight.
HOU-Ku Haiku #009, Grannie Does Your Dog Bite?
The bats finally
Woke up and began to growl.
Let those big dogs hunt.
HOU-Ku Haiku #010, Baseball is Strange
Scream at the rafters,
“Breathtaking weirdness through nine!”
I need oxygen.
- The Silent Art of Catcher Framing: How Max Stassi Quietly Became the League’s Most Valuable Catcher - by mhatter106
- Osvaldo Duarte Brings Mercurial Skillset to Corpus - by Spencer Morris
- Astros Top Prospect Report: 4/4 - 4/7 - by AstrosFuture
- 2019 Preseason Top Pitching Prospects: Houston Astros - by reillocity
Yankees at Astros (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #011, They’ll Always Be Bums
The last time Houston
Liked a Bum in the city,
He didn’t swing bats.
HOU-Ku Haiku #012, Taking the Series
A full team effort.
One game left, go find your broom;
The Astros are back.
HOU-Ku Haiku #013, What’s Up, Doc!
McHugh McCrushed it
And the bats backed up his spin.
Next on “The Twelve Six.”
- Is Will Harris One of the Best Relievers in Baseball? - by HebrewHammah
- Is This the Season Alex Bregman Reaches Escape Velocity? - by bilbos
- Were we duped about Chirinos’ defense? - by HebrewHammah
- The Most Encouraging Part of the Young 2019 Season - by Theo Gerome
Astros at Mariners (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #014, Filthy Two Ways
Peacock was a beast
With filthy movement both ways:
Home, and to second.
HOU-Ku Haiku #015, Get On Board
Verlander back on,
And ‘Tuve with a hot streak?
You can’t stop that train.
HOU-Ku Haiku #016, We’re OK With That
They got their homer,
Something we’re willing to give
For a sweep away.
- After Six Years in the AL, The Astros Are Still Learning How to Use the Designated Hitter - by mhatter106
- Astros Trending: Bi-weekly Review - by bilbos
- Altuve’s Big Week - by bilbos
- Is It too Soon to Question Kyle Tucker’s Top Prospect Status? - by bilbos
- Inside the Astros’ Nine-Game Win Streak - by scottydouble
Astros at Athletics (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #017, There Is No Spoon
A grand slam for Bregs
Lights up the Matrix, while Q
Goes full-on Neo.
HOU-Ku Haiku #018, Streaks Are Born to Die
The streak is over
But don’t mourn what could have been,
Start another one.
- What Watching Baseball was Like in Houston in 1963: One TCBer’s Experience for Jackie Robinson Day - by maris61
- Which new Astro has impressed you the most? - by HebrewHammah
- Is Osuna the best reliever in baseball? - by HebrewHammah
- Ryan Pressly is the Best Reliever in Baseball Since Joining the Astros - by bilbos
- 3 Discussion Items: Kimbrel, Alvarez, You Be the GM - by HebrewHammah
- 2019 MLB Draft Profile: Keoni Cavaco, 3B, Eastlake HS (CA) - by Spencer Morris
- The Looming Roster Crunch - by Exile in St. Louis
- Did Tim Anderson’s Bat Flip Cross the Line? - by bilbos
Astros at Rangers (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #019, Funny How That Works
A win, no surprise.
But that’s the way the game goes
When Kulpa can’t help.
HOU-Ku Haiku #020, Cole Couldn’t
A game for the books.
Until today I’d never
Wanted to burn them.
HOU-Ku Haiku #021, Perspective
A football score loss,
But the important thing is,
Travis gets better.
- 3 Discussion Items: Bullpen help, Trades, Kemp & White - by HebrewHammah
- The Astros base running - a major weakness? - by HebrewHammah
- Astros Top Prospect Report: 4/15 - 4/21 - by AstrosFuture
Twins at Astros (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #022, But At Least I’m Home
We had our chances,
But came up short once again.
Get that MoJo back.
HOU-Ku Haiku #023, Turning The Lights On At Closing
Not always pretty,
But an ugly win will beat
A glamorous loss.
HOU-Ku Haiku #024, Coming Correct
JV had something
To prove after his last start.
Eye of The Tiger.
- Twinkietown and TCB Answer Each Other’s Questions - by TJ Gorsegner & bilbos
- Jose Altuve’s Power is No Fluke - by bilbos
- Is It Time to Call Up Yordan Alvarez? - by mhatter106
- Podcast: bilbos talks Astros with baseballphd.net
- 2019 MLB Draft Profile: Quinn Priester, RHP, Cary-Grove Community HS (IL) - by Spencer Morris
- Astros Prospect Stock Report 2019: Volume 1 - by AstrosFuture
Indians at Astros (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #025, Take It In Stride
We’ve seen some ups and some downs
It’s a marathon.
HOU-Ku Haiku #026, Just Shut Up Already
I’m tired of reading the crap.
You make it no fun.
HOU-Ku Haiku #027, Beautiful
Has a membership in the.
Tony Kemp Fan Club.
HOU-Ku Haiku #028, Split Series
We played a tough club
And came away with a split.
We’ll see them again.
- 3 Discussion Items: Verlander, Starting Pitching, Top Prospect Struggles - by HebrewHammah
- Astros Trending Bi-weekly Review, April 11 - April 23: Hitting - by bilbos
- Astros Trending Bi-weekly Review, April 11 - April 23: Pitching - by bilbos
- The Astros Should Hold onto White and Kemp (For Now) - by Theo Gerome
- The Prince and the Pauper: The Differing Fortunes of Robinson Chirinos and Max Stassi - by mhatter106
- Josh Reddick - Small Sample Size or the Real Deal? - by HebrewHammah
Astros at Twins (series preview)
HOU-Ku Haiku #029, Not For Action Flick Fans
Epic pitchers’ duel
Frustrates the offense of both,
But we came up short.
HOU-Ku Haiku #030, Winter is Coming
On a cold, wet night
Cole threw the big, nasty heat
And our bats lit up.
- Is Josh James a Not Quite Ready For Prime Time Player? - by bilbos
- Astros Top Prospect Report: 4/22 - 4/28 - by AstrosFuture
- What a time to be an Astros Fan - by HebrewHammah
- Astros MiLB Outfielder Notes - by Spencer Morris
- 3 Discussion Items: Cole, the Astros’ Start, Reddick - by HebrewHammah
Finally, in the Predict the Astros Mar/Apr Record Contest, the winner is. . . HebrewHammah, who correctly predicted a record of 18-12 and guessed a run differential of 30, just 8 off the actual differential of 38. Honorable mentions go to Orlandocepeda, who also forecasted an 18-12 record, but with a run differential of 47, 9 off the mark. HebrewHammah wins the satisfaction of winning a contest to which he made up the rules.