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Astros 5, Rangers 0: Keuchel completes shutout of Rangers

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Wait...you mean that the Astros actually beat the Rangers?!

Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports

The team's bats stayed silent once again as the Astros faced another drubbing by the Texas Rangers.

Ahem. Whoops. Sorry ya'll. The way the team has been playing against the Rangers you wouldn't blame me if I started writing tonights recap before the game started. We've all seen how this has played out so far this year, and it is Friday after all, we've all got better stuff to do right?

Well I decided to do the right thing and actually give the Astros a chance and watch the game, and I'll be gosh-darned they actually won! Against the Texas Rangers! It's a summer miracle!

Dallas Keuchel gave up a hit to Shin Soo-Choo to start the game but a double play ball by Ian Desmond ended the threat. Thank goodness too since Carlos Beltran followed with a 2-out double and Adrian Beltre also reached base via walk. Keuchel was able to finish off Rougned Odor to end the inning and really settled in from there, arguably pitching his best game of the season by twirling a 3-hit complete game shut-out.

The Astros got on the board early with 4 runs in the bottom of the 3rd inning. Beginning with a broadcast booth visit by former Astro Glenn Davis, he seemed to provide the mojo necessary to break the team's hitting slump. A hit by Jake Marisnick got it started and Alex Bregman was able to reach base via walk. A double by the illustrious Jose Altuve plated Marisnick for the first run, and singles by Carlos Correa and Tyler White drove in 3 more runs, and that was pretty much all the offense the Astros needed.

The great Altuve wasn't done quite yet though, as he decided to go ahead and double in George Springer in the 7th inning to make it a final score of 5-0 Astros. They did it! They beat the Texas Rangers!

Special thanks to Glenn Davis for the positive juju. Mr. Davis if you're free this weekend then please stay in the booth with Brownie and Ash for the Rangers series so the Astro bats can stay alive. They need all the help they can get!