Many of minor league teams that have recently changed team logos were the direct result of a work done by Brandiose - for example the Ironpigs, Sugar Land Skeeters and Akron RubberDucks (read Anthony's story about them for Let's Go Tribe). This isn't the first non-traditional logo cap they have created, as former Astros affiliate the Lexington Legends now have a mustache hat.
Let's get back to the topic at hand, the bacon hat. It got me thinking, what if each team had it's own food cap? What would that look like? How would you decide the food for each team? Well, I could have put it all up to a vote but democracy takes too look long. So I used twitter, which is a great source for answering questions, right? If you have a problem with this, direct your anger to the entirety of twitter - in a way, you'll be yelling at clouds.
The Braves had this coming. Last season the Braves opened up a Waffle House stand in Turner Field. If you have ever been in a Waffle House at night, you know that Waffle House is like an ant farm for southern stereotypes. That said, this feels like a perfect fit for the Braves. Tuna steak represents something exotic and exciting like South Beach, but also represents the fact that the Marlins eat their own kind. Pastrami on rye and a Philly cheesesteak are generic, but there wasn't a better fit. Finally, a half-smoke will be the first in the trend of tube meat covered in cheese and more meat.
It's kind of in the name, Chicago Dog, a Chicago-specific hot dog has to represent the Cubs. After all, Cubs fans are (to quote M David Coleman) wieners. While I've never had it, the first food that comes to mind when I thought of Cincinnati was Skyline Chili. Bratwurst is something that I hold near and dear to my heart and they probably already near to my heart blocking an artery. My grandparents are from Green Bay, so Brats were as much of a staple in my house as hot dogs. My people said pierogies were the choice for the Indians and Tigers, but the Pirates got them first when I was making my list. The Cardinals were one of the hardest picks to make. Kansas City had taken ribs already, so the red birds got one of the three desert representatives.
There were many different choices to pick from with Arizona. I picked tamales because that's what sounds good at the moment. For the Rockies, I needed some help. The only thing that came to mind was rocky mountain oysters, which I wanted no part of. So I asked Chris Chrisman of Purple Row for some advice:
@d_more55 Ha! I saw those Lehigh Valley caps earlier! Serious: Elk. Gross: Rocky Mountain Oysters. Post-Amendment 64: Brownies.— Chris Chrisman (@chrischrisman) February 24, 2014
The California teams could have been a shell game between the four different cities, but I felt like I found the best fit for each one. Except of course, San Francisco - which I had to give the more hipsterish/foodie food possible. Clearly, that's kale at the moment.
Baltimore only had two options, crab or Old Bay seasoning. I went with the former. I mean seriously they sell chips with Old Bay seasoning on them. Now boys and girls let's do our best JFK impersonation and say "clam chowder". Now that you have that image in your head, there is nothing else you can pick for the Red Sox. If the Mets get pastrami, then Yankees get pizza. I'm not trying too overcomplicate things. I was told key lime pie was a big deal in Florida, so naturally I assume the older generations attending the Rays game would be the ones baking them. Maybe it's just a stereotype (like much of this post) but it is my understanding that our brothers and sisters up north are very fond of Tim Hortons. So why not add a donut to the cap and a maple leaf for good measure.
This by far was the hardest division to pick out food for, and I'm not particularly sure why, especially because there were a few slam dunks, deep dish for the White Sox and ribs for Kansas City. Yes, those ribs are covered in Billy Butler's barbecue sauce too, just like Eric Hosmer.
Jeremy Guthrie (@TheRealJGuts) June 13, 2013
As for the Indians, Ballpark Mustard seemed like perfect fit for a baseball cap. With the Tigers, I was worried about a half smoke and coney dog being too similar to pick it right off the bat. Twitter was overwhelming with it's response for the coney dog as the food of choice for Detroit so I caved. Last but not least, a juicy lucy is a Minneapolis creation so I have to keep it close to home.
Texas is the home to the best brisket in the United States. I said it, and I stand by it. So of course the Astros get brisket. The Angels are a non-specific food truck. Always trying to find it's place in the city, while being the hipster joint to go against the mainstream. Oakland, I wanted to give you something else, because I don't actually see a In-N-Out Burger inside the city limits on their website. But, eventually you'll move out to San Jose so it's all good. Seattle, you're known for Starbucks, and you'll probably always be known for Starbucks until the end of time. Blame Starbucks for opening up on every corner across America for that one. Now, we come to the Rangers. Since Arlington is so close to Dallas, they can unnecessarily claim something else for themselves in the food world too. Fletcher's corny dogs are a staple of the Texas state fair and Texas/OU weekend.
Yes, this was an exercise in madness. What do you think? Would you wear any of these caps? What would you have put on a cap?