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Astros Lose To Cardinals 9-5

Not a 9-5 job, it's a 9-5 loss, boss.

Come here, little ball!
Come here, little ball!
Dilip Vishwanat

Last week my favorite word was awful, and quite honestly I am getting pretty tired of all these negative words. So how about dad-gum ugly? No, we shouldn't curse, that's just bad etiquette. Instead, I'll opt for the word 'Sultry' which, according to a Google search, has two different meanings which I think both can be used to describe the game and anyone who was devoted enough to stick around to watch it.

For the part meaning "hot and humid", I think this describes the unfantastical pitching done by Bud Norris and Lucas Harrell tonight. But, due to some excellent observer on the game thread, we discover that perhaps Bud should not be blamed for some of the 7 runs tagged to his pitching line of 5 innings, 11 hits, 1 walk, and 5 Ks:

Thank you, Joe. How is Birmingham by the way? Are there a lot of cat people there?

And that wasn't the only defensive miscue of the game. While both sides played errorless baseball, Jimmy Paredes YOLO'd the ball past the cut-off man and to add to that, his throw was off target. His arm must be from places where stallions run wild because nobody can control that thing.

Lucas Harrell was the 2nd and final pitcher to pitch for the Astros. He went 3 innings, giving up 2 runs on 2 walks and 4 hits, 0 strikeouts. Clearly not his best day either.

On the offense, none seemed to be able to master Adam Wainwright. He gave up 1 run in 7 innings and struck out 9 batters. That run in the 6th was the only run scored by the Astros until they scored 4 in the 9th off of some relief pitchers who might have been sultry. But that rally that started off of a couple of walks ended on a J.D. Martinez strikeout. Oh what a lovely taste to leave behind. But don't feel too bad; we're one step closer to Rodon! I'm so glad the Astros have decided to lose now and not tomorrow; procrastination always results in missed-out Rodons.

So with this loss, I'm now 1-10 in covering games this year. Can you believe that? Like I've said before, you can take the next Tuesday Astros game off without having to worry about missing an Astros win. I'm sure your boyfriend or girlfriend or wife or son or grandma or stalker would love to have a date night with your face staring at him or her and not the TV screen. Make sure to book those dinner reservations for July 23rd. Who knows, maybe that will be something fun?