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Now, now, listen here. I've got a story to top all that.
Let me tell you about the time the Houston Astros, that laughing stock of the league, that team which flouted the very integrity of the game, went into Anaheim and swept the mighty Angels.
I know, right? It sounds ridiculous. If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I woudn't believe it either.
After taking two games in Colorado, these 2013 Astros got on a roll. They beat the Angels on Friday, took care of business on Saturday and Sunday, but still had to finish off the sweep on Monday.
Yep, that's right. This team not only swept the Angels, they won six games in a row. No Astros team had done that since 2008 (when the 'Stros did that twice). Only four Houston teams won at least six in a row since 2001.
But, let's get back to the point. This team that everyone counted out was matched up with the big, bad Angels. I mean, this Angels team had a payroll of $137 million. That same Angels team features names you've heard of before as the best of the best in baseball.
Josh Hamilton.
Mike Trout.
Albert Pujols.
I know, right? That team SHOULD beat the crap out of the Astros regularly. Heading into Monday, though, the Astros had taken six of nine from the Halos. It was one of those crazy statistical anomaly things, right? On any given Sunday, you know?
So, things had to even out eventually. That's what the Angels thought too on Monday.
Things looked up for the Halos, too, as their starter Joe Blanton came out and held Houston hitless through four innings. Not just hitless. Without a single baserunner.
See, the Astros did that from time to time. They had almost gotten no hit by Yu Darvish earlier this season and DID get no hit by Matt Cain last year. Right, right, no so good with the contact sometimes.
I wouldn't blame you if you expected the Astros to just be glad to be there and see some journeyman like Blanton rise up to no-hit them. After Blanton struck out J.D. Martinez and Carlos Pena, Chris Carter came up.
Yeah, he's the guy they call Trogdor. From that video, exactly. I know, it's hilarious. Great nickname.
But, the thing with Carter is that he's not so good at hitting the baseball. He's only hitting .225 this season and striking out 37 percent of the time. Contact isn't big on his list of priorities. But, man, when he does make contact, he REALLY makes contact.
With one swing, Carter turned a perfect game into a 1-1 tie. Houston had stolen back all the momentum. One inning later, Brandon Barnes hit a fly ball to center field, scoring third baseman Matt Dominguez to make it 2-1 Houston. Yep, I agree. Matty D does have a sweet, sweet glove.
That was all the room the Astros needed, as it turned out. But, things weren't a cinch.
See, Houston had Erik Bedard on the mound to start the game. Bedard had been pretty awful this season. He didn't even make it out of the first inning earlier this year and got demoted from the starting lineup.
He got cut by the Pirates in the middle of the season last year, for Pete's sake. That's bad.
And yet, Bedard was there Monday, twirling and twirling and twirling, keeping the hitters off-balance for seven innings. He only struck out two, walking one and giving up five hits with that one run. But, Bedard got it done.
He turned things over to the Astros bullpen, where Welsey Wright and Josh Fields got through the eights. Wright and Fields. No, not many people have heard of them. Hey! That's too far. I'm pretty sure their mom's HAVE heard of them.
After that, it was all up to Jose Veras to close the game out. Yep, the same guy who pitched for a million teams before. Yep, the guy with no control.
See, he's been pretty good for the Astros this year. Had saved 10 games so far and looked pretty good doing it. Sure, he had some bumps in the road, but he'd been a solid late-inning guy for this team that didn't really need it.
Veras came in, got two quick outs and then ran into some trouble. Alberto Callaspo hit a ground-rule double down the line to right field. Then, he walked that Hamilton dude after going 1-2 on him in the count.
Luckily, Veras was able to bear down against pinch-hitter Hank Conger, striking him out to end the game with a called strike call.
Yep, the Angels got swept and didn't even get to swing the bat on the final out.
I know, it's crazy, right? This team that should lose 100 games this season suddenly can't lose. Maybe they just can't lose to the Angels.
Now, can you top that one?
What's that?
Who are the 'Miracle Mets'?