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Bad Luck, Sausage, and David Carr's love: How the Houston Astros will reach the postseason

It's now gotten to the point where winning the rest of our games won't ensure us much of anything, least of all a playoff slot. Johan pitched magnificently for the Mets, and if need-be, can pitch again on the final Sunday of the regular season. He's sort of gotten lost in the shuffle of this season, what with a lot of great pitching performances- Cliff Lee, Brandon Webb, Jon Lester, Tim Lincecum. Of all the additions from the end of last season to the present, his may be the most important (yes that includes CC Sabathia). Tom Glavine was the man who the Mets turned to on that last Sunday of the regular season in 2007, and seven runs and 1/3 of an inning later he exited, ensuring that New York would in a span of 18 days waste a seven game NL East lead.

What we Stros fans need is some good ol' fashioned bad luck to befall the Metropolitans/Brewers. Not bad luck, like slipping and falling into the East River, but a little bad luck like negative karma/vibes/feelins or whatever you'd like to call it. The following is a shortened list of "unlucky" acts/omens that I found on Yahoo!. How can these three unlucky omens come to benefit the Astros? Well, let's go down the list:

A black cat crossing your path:

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Photo courtesy of: reversethecurse.com

Done and done. Happened to the Cubs back in '69. At Shea Stadium no less. Cubsfan always yell, "Reverse the Curse!". I don't particularly care if those Bleacher Bums ever make a World Series again, but for one series I hope that black cat's grand-kitten walks right across David Wright's feet.

Milk curdling:

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Photo courtesy of: My own attempt at humor

Coming up to the big leagues, I guess Prince Fielder was under the assumption that you had to, well...be BIG to play well. After coming to grips with his own weight issues after much contemplation (oh wait- his wife convinced him to change his eating habits...way to man up, Prince), he decided to forgo these guys and instead opt to chow down on this pregame. Cows everywhere rejoiced. No longer would they have to wait, ever vigilant for Princey boy to sneak up and take a bite. If he's truly hardcore, he probably gave up milk too. There has to be some of Wisconsin's finest cow juice curdling in the back of his fridge.

Taking off your wedding ring
: If you're at all unfamiliar with the current state of Houston Texans football, this is all you need to know. Top overall draft choice in 2002 David Carr would often times wear a glove on each hand during games to  better grip the ball. Sidenote: there have been great quarterbacks in the NFL, there have been some average QB's and some real stinkers (of which Carr is one), but how many of them improved their play by wearing two gloves? None. (Again, of which Carr is one). Ok, I'm back: Carr also wore a glove on his left hand because he would wear his wedding ring during games. Pretty strong statement of his love and devotion to Mrs. Carr. I mean, his career completion percentage is still under 60% and he's thrown eight more picks than touchdowns in seven NFL seasons, but damnit, he's a great husband. This bit of fidelity hasn't improved his ability to decipher a zone defense, but maybe it can bring his old stomping grounds a bit of luck on the baseball diamond.