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Matchup Game # 84 vs. Cubs

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Enough with the fucking 
towel already
Mark Prior Andy Pettitte
0 - 3, 9.00 6 - 9, 5.58

The last time Andy Pettitte won, it was versus these very Cubs on June 13, so perhaps he's got a shot today--but I'm less than hopeful.

Although it was a little less recent than Lefty's last victory, I also am put in mind of a grand slam that our own Mikey Lamb hit off Prior on Mayday, 2005. If Lambchops was able to hit a granny on that old Socialist holiday, might we perhaps see him do the same on the birthday of the world's greatest democracy?

Or maybe it'll be Berkman hitting the salami. He's a God, Country, and Texas kind of guy, plus he's hotter than the upholstery in a hearse on a sunny day right now.

Certainly I hope it's sunny where you are. Enjoy the game, and today's holiday; I shan't be around, and I'd guess most readers won't be either, so maybe no PBP.

I think the site might survive.

But whatever you do today, wherever you go, remember to honor our country--and say some bad things about the Chicago Cubs.