Well, now I'm depressed because of the Dave & Brett news. Depressed enough to write little piece...
...
Another season in the books
Another putrid campaign
Another year of watching others
Pop the glorious champagne
...
Those scumbag Rangers lost the West
But will prolly beat the birds
They sure might go on to win it all
Just to anger us beyond words
...
Footer and Z have packed their bags
Brownie may retire
And now, Dave and Brett are gone
Throwing gas upon the fire
...
It took a furious rally
Just to finish one game to the rear
Of the awful pace we had to face
When we were 'terrible' last year
...
Our roster still looks feeble
In fact, it really sucks
So far behind, the new league won't mind
When we spend our $30 million bucks
...
Sure we've got some prospects
Tell that to Kansas City
They've got young talent in spades
But their picture still isn't pretty
...
Our ballpark is a ghost town
There's dust in half the seats
But next year will be better!
...As Ranger fans flood our streets
...
We've got a top notch architect
Laying down the law
But he's building a bridge to the future
With his only material, straw
...
And then there's the upcoming switch
Mutilating the past 50 years
Where we will be subjected
To Red Sox and Yankee jeers
...
Enjoy the bitter winter folks
Try to forget what you've seen
Start bracing for spring training early
It's gonna be an unlucky '13
...